Raise children for faith, not just success
Tarbiyah, the holistic, Allah-centered nurturing of children stage by stage to their full potential, is a communal responsibility that must go far beyond physical and intellectual care to include the spiritual and emotional development American Muslims are neglecting.
The khutbah in 8 steps
- Opening: khutbahs have been political since Oct 7, but local spiritual crises (Pew stat that 1 in 4 American Muslims may leave Islam; normalization of zina) demand attention
- Tarbiyah is everyone's job, parents, siblings, uncles, aunties, the whole community
- Lexical definition (al-Raghib al-Isfahani): tarbiyah shares the root of 'Rabb' and means growing a thing stage by stage to full potential, unlike 'raising kids' as filling an empty pot
- Children have fitrah; parents remove harmful environmental factors rather than hijack personalities, Allah-centered, not parent-centered parenting
- Point one: tarbiyah's foundation must be Allah-centered (Tawheed), not money-centered as in modern capitalist upbringing; success is Jannah, not degrees or wealth
- Point two: tarbiyah must be holistic, physical, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual; emotional and spiritual tarbiyah are the most neglected
- Critique of the average Muslim kid's 24-hour schedule with almost no Allah in it; doubts in college are symptoms of 10-15 years of neglect
- Close: parenting takes sabr and optimism; announcement of a future tarbiyah workshop, dua for Sheikh Yafi departing for Medina, janazah announcement
In the khateeb's words
“very soon one out of every four American Muslims will leave Islam”
“that your kids are not empty pot they have the introduction to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala they have the soul they have the fitrah”
“he used to say that becoming parents is easy doing parenting is difficult”
For the dinner table
In this khutbah, Dr. Asif Hirani explained the true meaning of tarbiyah, an Arabic word from the same root as 'Rabb' that means helping something grow stage by stage until it reaches its full potential, not just 'raising' or 'educating' kids. He warned that studies suggest as many as one in four American Muslims may leave Islam, and that our community has grown numb to dangers we once took seriously. Children, he said, are not empty pots to be filled, they are born with a fitrah, a natural inclination toward Allah, and parents' real job is to clear away the bad influences that bury it. Tarbiyah must be Allah-centered, not money-centered: a child who earns degrees and wealth but loses Islam has lost, while a practicing Muslim who succeeds in this world has the best of both. It must also be holistic, caring for the body, the mind, the emotions, and above all the soul, which is the part we most often neglect. Finally, he reminded everyone that tarbiyah is a team effort: mothers and fathers working together, and every sibling, uncle, aunty, and community member playing a part.
- If our kids aren't empty pots but already have a fitrah inside them, what do you think is one thing in your daily life that helps it grow, and one thing that covers it up?
- Look at your schedule for yesterday, where did Allah show up in it, and where could He show up tomorrow?
- The imam said even how you smile at a younger kid in the masjid is tarbiyah, what's one small thing you could do this week for someone younger than you?
More on Youth & education
Muhammadi Masjid · Elmont, NY · Sep 25, 2026Parents must teach Islam at home“You have to save yourself and then you have to save your family from the fire of Jahannam.”
It starts at home by presenting the real role model for our children.29:05TARIC · Downsview, ON · Oct 31, 2026Parents shape their children's faith
ICOPS · Lynnwood, WA · Oct 17, 2026Parents must teach children Islam