5:39 Ibadah is not just…7:42 sometimes because I…18:27 proper love does not…25:15 My loyalty is to…
Family & marriageFrom the masjid's own video, Aug 22, 2026.

Love sometimes means saying no

ICYL · Hassan Elwan

“Sometimes, because I love you, the answer is no; because I love you, I have to stand against you.”

The khateeb, at 7:42

Watch the khutbahFamily kit
In one sentence

Proper love is not unconditional compliance; it must be rooted in greater love for Allah and His Messenger, expressed through boundaries, correction, service, and concern for the hereafter.

The khutbah in 6 steps

  1. The khutbah opens with mindfulness of Allah and a story illustrating ordered love.
  2. It defines proper love as obedience with love, balanced by greater love for Allah and His Messenger.
  3. It explains why love may require saying no to harmful or sinful requests.
  4. It presents withholding and correction as forms of divine love that protect and reform.
  5. It applies the principle to parenting, prayer habits, character, and prioritizing the hereafter.
  6. It concludes that loyalty to Allah must govern family, national, and communal loyalties.
Try this week
Root love in love of Allah and His Messenger.
Say no when someone asks for something sinful, harmful, or enabling.
Correct children lovingly and build habits of prayer, Quran, and good character.
Prioritize loved ones' faith and hereafter over worldly comforts.
Help people in need and treat mothers, siblings, and community members well.
Assess whether personal love is distorted by codependence or selfish need.
Quotes

In the khateeb's words

“Ibadah is not just ta'ah it's not just obedience Ibadah is obedience with love”
ICYL · Yorba Linda, CA
Play from 5:39
“sometimes because I love you the answer is no because I love you I have to stand against you”
ICYL · Yorba Linda, CA
Play from 7:42
“proper love does not mean I don't correct proper love does not mean that I don't punish my kids”
ICYL · Yorba Linda, CA
Play from 18:27
“My loyalty is to Allah. That overrides my love to anything and everything. That way, my love is balanced.”
ICYL · Yorba Linda, CA
Play from 25:15
Talk about it at home

For the dinner table

The khutbah taught that love is a gift from Allah, but love is not the same as giving people everything they want. Proper love is guided by a greater love for Allah and His Messenger, so sometimes it says no to a harmful or sinful request and offers correction instead. Parents should help children build prayer, Quran, character, and concern for the hereafter, even when that feels difficult in the moment. We also show love by helping others and treating family well, while keeping our loyalty to what is right.

  1. When might saying “no” be a loving choice?
  2. What good habit can make prayer easier later?
  3. How can we help someone this week?
Where it was given

The masjid

Islamic Center of Yorba Linda4382 Eureka Ave, Yorba Linda, CA 92886Jumu'ah 1:00 PM & 2:15 PMKhateebHassan ElwanMore khutbahsArchiveAll khutbahs at ICYL7 khutbahs
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