Raise children through presence and example
“We have to find a way to make sure that presence is there, so that the child can trust us and knows that we would never get angry with them.”
Recognizing the family and social signs of the Day of Judgment should motivate Muslims to raise children through good example, honor parents wisely, cultivate presence, and place healthy limits on technology.
The khutbah in 6 steps
- Introduces signs of the Hour as warnings connected to human behavior and a call to personal change.
- Explains the sign of a mother giving birth to her master through fitrah and the family’s influence on children.
- Discusses modeling kindness, moral discipline, fulfilled promises, and humility in parenting.
- Distinguishes honoring parents from obedience, using Qur’an and Sunnah to define the limits of each duty.
- Examines absent parental presence, outside influences, and phones as potential trials within family life.
- Urges phone restrictions and regular phone-free time with loved ones, then shares focused religious practice as a means of reform.
In the khateeb's words
“The way we raise them, we have to deal with them when we get older.”
“But we have to find a way to make sure that presence is there, so that the child can trust us and knows that we would never get angry with them.”
“Obedience is a different matter. Obedience through experience you'll understand if this person knows what they're talking about.”
“I'm going to leave my phone in my room and I'm going to go spend an hour with them.”
For the dinner table
The khutbah reminded us that troubling signs in society should move us toward change, not blame or despair. Children begin with a natural inclination toward good, but they also absorb the habits, promises, conflicts, and values they see at home. Parents should combine kindness and consistency with humility, including admitting when a child is right. Providing food and shelter is important worship, but children and spouses also need our time, presence, and a safe place to speak without being judged. Phones can bring benefit or harm, so families can protect their peace by setting thoughtful limits and regularly spending screen-free time together.
- What is one good habit you think children learn by watching the adults around them?
- What helps you feel safe telling your family about something difficult?
- What would be fun for us to do together for one phone-free hour?
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