Children remember how parents treat them
“Children remember the words and the actions.”
The Prophet Muhammad’s interaction with a child teaches parents to create lasting positive memories through kindness, culturally responsive communication, freedom for age-appropriate curiosity, and direct prayer for their children.
The khutbah in 4 steps
- Introduces the hadith of Umm Khalid, whose childhood interaction with the Prophet remained vivid for years.
- Explains that children remember parental words and actions, making harsh labels especially damaging.
- Encourages parents to communicate at children’s level and honor their language and cultural identity.
- Urges parents to make explicit du'a for their children, including directly in their presence.
In the khateeb's words
“That children remember the words and the actions, which us as parents, we may not necessarily, particularly think that it is an important action. But they will hold on to that for a long time.”
“When we communicate with our children on their terms, that we are setting a strong foundation for a relationship that is built on trust and affection and assurance, raising them up to be strong and in their personality.”
“Let them be as Allah sallallahu alaihi wa sallam created them.”
“May Allah bless you for the good that you do, my son, my daughter.”
For the dinner table
The khateeb focused on a hadith about a young girl, Umm Khalid, who remembered the Prophet’s warmth and du'a for many years. He taught that children carry small words and actions with them, so parents should replace harsh labels with praise, gentle correction, and repair when needed. He encouraged adults to meet children at their level, respect their language and culture, and leave room for curiosity and play. He also urged parents to make du'a for their children aloud and directly, so they hear their parents asking Allah to bless them. The message was to build homes where children feel welcomed, understood, and loved.
- What is one small kindness you remember for a long time?
- How can we show someone that we understand their world?
- What blessing would you like our family to ask Allah for you?
The masjid
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