Choose faith first when choosing a spouse
“Marry the person for the deen and you'll be successful.”
Muslim family relationships require mercy, wise parenting, thoughtful marriage choices, appreciation, and continual du'a so spouses and children grow in faith and leadership.
The khutbah in 6 steps
- Critiques indulgent parenting and misplaced compassion for pets while recalling the Prophet's mercy toward Hasan and Husayn.
- Explains that marriage may involve beauty, wealth, lineage, and family background, but deen should be prioritized.
- Urges parents to understand spouses' childhood wounds and balance firmness with wisdom when arranging marriages.
- Encourages spouses and family members to express appreciation and affection in ordinary moments.
- Calls for constant du'a for marriages, children, and protection from Shaytan, drawing on Qur'anic examples.
- Concludes by urging parents to raise confident Muslim children who become leaders in faith, academics, and professional life.
In the khateeb's words
“Marry the person for the deen And you'll be successful Let the man have deen Let his wife have deen”
“When you get married You're marrying that person's childhood Was he abused? Was he neglected? Did his father ever tell him I love you?”
“Make this the day Where you go to your wife Today And you say to your wife I appreciate everything you've done”
For the dinner table
Today's khutbah reminded us to treat our families with mercy, understanding, and clear boundaries. The khateeb described the Prophet's patience with children and asked parents to understand the difficult times young people are growing up in. He encouraged choosing a spouse for faith and character and remembering that a person's childhood can shape how they show affection. He urged husbands, wives, and children to express appreciation to one another and to their parents today. He also encouraged regular du'a for our families, asking Allah to make them a joy to us and to help our children grow confident in their faith and become good leaders.
- What is one thing someone in our family did recently that you would like to thank them for?
- What would you like us to ask Allah for together tonight?
- What helps you feel confident about being Muslim when someone misunderstands your faith?
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