Arrogance blinds us to people's dignity
“The most prevalent manifestation of this kibur in our day-to-day lives is to reduce and simplify people to singular characteristics.”
Arrogance (kibr), expressed as seeing oneself as better than others, distorts one's perception of Allah, oneself, and people, while true humility requires listening, apologizing, serving, and recognizing every person's dignity.
The khutbah in 6 steps
- Introduces the Adam and Iblis narrative through Iblis's claim, “Ana khayrun minhu” (“I am better than him”).
- Distinguishes arrogance from confidence and explains kibr as a theological and perceptual distortion.
- Contrasts fire's speed and appetite with clay's malleability, patience, and stillness.
- Applies humility and arrogance to family, parenting, elders, mosque greetings, workplaces, race, class, and stereotyping.
- Uses Prophetic examples to urge apology, attentive listening, service, and engagement across differences.
- Closes with a supplication for purified hearts, mercy, sincerity, and a humble return to Allah.
In the khateeb's words
“Confidence enables me to see where I have strength as whereas I have non-strength. Arrogance just has me see what's wrong with everybody else.”
“The most prevalent manifestation of this kibur in our day-to-day lives is to reduce and simplify people to singular characteristics.”
“Find somebody today before you leave from Jummah, whether you're in this room or on the street, that you know you could get away with never speaking to.”
“And then listen. All you got to do is listen. Don't rush to the next thing.”
For the dinner table
Today’s khutbah taught that arrogance, or kibr, begins with the attitude “I am better than him,” the attitude Iblis showed toward Adam. Confidence is different: it recognizes our gifts with gratitude, while humility remembers that we depend on Allah and other people. The Prophet modeled humility by listening patiently, greeting people, serving others, and caring for ordinary tasks. We were encouraged to notice arrogance in our families, workplaces, mosque, and assumptions about people, then apologize, listen, and reach across differences. A humble heart sees the dignity in every person and returns to Allah with sincerity, mercy, and hope.
- What is the difference between being confident and thinking we are better than others?
- How can we make someone feel seen and welcomed?
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