6:32 That trait is his…21:32 Ithar is about not…
Character & conductFrom the masjid's own video, Sep 3, 2025.

Choose others’ dignity over winning

ISNA Canada (ICC)

“Ithar is about not saying with your tongue what you wouldn't want someone to say to you either.”

The khateeb, at 21:32

Watch the khutbahFamily kit
In one sentence

True faith is lived through ithar, empathy and preferring others’ dignity, happiness, and needs over one’s own, practiced consistently in everyday interactions.

The khutbah in 6 steps

  1. Introduces empathy and ithar as the Prophet’s defining character and connects them to loving for others what one loves for oneself.
  2. Explains that ithar extends beyond money and begins Abu Bakr’s three examples.
  3. Retells Abu Bakr freeing Bilal and defending his honor against Umayya.
  4. Shows Abu Bakr’s regret in his dispute with Rabi'ah and frames restraint from hurtful speech as ithar.
  5. Describes Abu Bakr wishing Abu Talib had received guidance, then expands ithar through Imam al-Ghazali’s belt-sharing example.
  6. Closes with small daily acts such as yielding in traffic, softening behavior, and practicing consistency, followed by supplication.
Try this week
Prefer another person’s dignity and happiness over winning a conflict.
When someone is being degraded, intervene if able or at least speak up.
Hold your tongue when angry, especially when you have a devastating response ready.
Give up a winning argument when continuing would damage a relationship.
Let people merge in traffic and practice small acts of courtesy consistently.
Sources the khateeb cited
Quran 68:4
Quran 59:9Names ithar as preferring others even while personally in need.
Quran 61:2-3Warns against saying what one does not practice.
Quran 28:56Explains that guidance belongs to Allah, even concerning those we love.
Quotes

In the khateeb's words

“That trait is his ability to have empathy for other people. His ability to care and to prefer somebody in a situation where every single person would have expected to be preferred themselves.”
ISNA Canada (ICC) · Sheridan, ON
Play from 6:32
“Ithar is about not saying with your tongue what you wouldn't want someone to say to you either”
ISNA Canada (ICC) · Sheridan, ON
Play from 21:32
Talk about it at home

For the dinner table

Today’s khutbah taught that faith is not only what we say, but how we treat people. The Prophet’s example showed empathy: wanting goodness, dignity, and happiness for others as we want them for ourselves. Abu Bakr demonstrated this by freeing Bilal, protecting his honor, controlling his speech, and wishing guidance for the Prophet’s uncle. We can practice ithar by holding our tongues, giving others the right of way, and choosing small acts of kindness every day. When these choices become consistent, they can change our families, workplaces, and communities.

  1. When is it hardest to let someone else go first?
  2. What hurtful words could we choose not to say?
  3. What small kindness could our family practice this week?
Where it was given

The masjid

ISNA Canada, Islamic Centre of Canada2200 South Sheridan Way, Mississauga, ON L5J 2M4Jumu'ah Two services · 1:00 PM, 3:00 PMArchiveAll khutbahs at ISNA Canada (ICC)124 khutbahs
Keep listening

More on Character & conduct

All on this topic
The strong is the one who controls himself while in anger.10:16Masjid Al-Noor · Waterloo, IA · Oct 31, 2026Control anger before it causes harmPeer pressure is an issue that is just as applicable to adults as it is to children.5:08The Rayyan Center · Plymouth, MI · Oct 31, 2026Adults must choose their influencesLowering your gaze is cleaner to your heart and fulfilling the amanah that Allah gave you.1:03:23Rahma Center · Lake Forest, CA · Oct 30, 2026Every trust from Allah must be honored