Forgive others to seek Allah's forgiveness
“It's never between you and the other person; it's between you and Allah.”
Forgiving others and repelling evil with kindness is not about the person who wronged you but about your relationship with Allah, whose forgiveness and pleasure should motivate believers to take the high road.
The khutbah in 8 steps
- Abu Bakr cuts support to Misthah for slandering Aisha, and Allah reveals the command to pardon and overlook
- Forgiveness reframed: ask not whether they deserve it, but whether you want Allah's forgiveness
- Quranic praise for those who suppress anger and pardon people; their unspecified reward is with Allah
- Going beyond forgiveness: repel evil with what is better, illustrated by the Prophet at Ta'if
- Everyday tests (ignored salams, public embarrassment) as opportunities to practice ihsan
- Yusuf and the Prophet at the conquest of Mecca both declare 'no blame upon you today' when holding power
- Imam Ahmad forgave his torturers to avoid meeting Allah with a grudge; the man of Jannah cleaned his heart nightly
- Closing: three self-questions to ask when hurt, and dua
In the khateeb's words
“And He says, let them pardon and overlook. Do you not love that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala forgives you? Allah is the most forgiving, most merciful.”
“none of us know with which deed we're going to enter Jannah. Perhaps that one time you forgave someone is the reason you enter Jannah. But you never know.”
“Every night before I sleep I remove any hatred and envy from my heart.”
“taking the high road it's never between you and the other person it's between you and Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala”
For the dinner table
Today the khateeb spoke about taking the high road when people hurt us. He reminded us of Abu Bakr, who forgave a relative who spread lies about his daughter Aisha because he wanted Allah to forgive him; of the Prophet Muhammad at Ta'if, who answered cruelty with mercy; and of Yusuf, who forgave his brothers after years of pain. The big idea is that forgiveness isn't mainly about the other person, it's about our own hearts and our relationship with Allah. When we choose kindness over getting even, we free ourselves from carrying anger and we open the door for Allah's mercy. The khateeb suggested three questions to ask when we're upset: Do I want Allah to forgive me? What response would please Allah most? And will this matter when I stand before Him? Let's try to make one small act of kindness or forgiveness this week.
- Has anyone been mean to you lately? What would the kind, high-road response look like?
- Is there someone you're still a little mad at? What would it feel like to let it go?
- What's one small thing our family can do this week to take the high road?
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