Backbiting divides hearts and damages faith
“All we have to do is just stay quiet.”
Backbiting and gossip begin with negative assumptions and fault-finding, divide relationships and damage faith, so Muslims should guard their speech, conceal faults, forgive, and reconcile, especially before Ramadan.
The khutbah in 6 steps
- Warns that sins become especially serious in sacred contexts such as Ramadan.
- Explains how suspicion leads to spying, then backbiting, like descending a ladder.
- Defines ghibah, namimah, and slander, including gossip through messages and social media.
- Describes the spiritual and communal consequences of gossip, including lost reward and division.
- Urges concealing others’ faults, guarding the tongue, and forgiving before Ramadan.
- Calls listeners to reconcile disputes by following the Prophet’s example.
In the khateeb's words
“first you assume things about others that are false then you start looking for each other's faults and then you start backbiting one another and talking bad about each other behind their backs”
“So backbiting is always true. If you're saying something that the person never did, then that's even one step higher, that is slander.”
“If you found something bad about another person, and instead of publicly sharing it or defaming that person's reputation, you covered it up”
“All we have to do is just stay quiet. That's all. There's nothing, there's no exercise, there's no standing up in prayer all night. It's simple, just don't talk.”
For the dinner table
Imam Hasan Wali reminded us that our words can bring hearts together or push them apart. He described how unfair assumptions can lead to searching for someone's faults and then talking behind their back. Even something true can be backbiting, and hurtful gossip can travel through texts and social media as well as spoken words. As Ramadan approaches, he encouraged us to guard our tongues, pay attention to our own shortcomings, and protect other people's dignity. He ended by urging us to forgive and repair relationships, following the Prophet's example of bringing people together.
- What is a kinder explanation you could consider when someone's actions upset you?
- What could you say when a group chat starts making fun of someone who isn't there?
- What is one small thing our family could do this week to help people get along?
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